It’s easier for us to learn to speak horse, than it is for the horse to learn to speak human.
A great horseman told me once, “It’s easier for us to learn to speak horse, than it is for the horse to learn to speak human” and this has really stuck with me. This is pretty much the basis of all natural horsemanship. A good horseman realizes this and implements it; the great ones use it by second nature. Get so familiar with your horse’s language that it becomes second nature to you.
When I was going to college “Natural Horsemanship” had gained quite the reputation with John Lyons, Pat Parelli and Monte Roberts all making their claims to fame. I learned their methods and how to work a horse in a round pen and use the carrot stick and the rope halter with the 14’ training lead. I found them awkward and cumbersome. I really didn’t like the gimmicks of it so I decided then that I wasn’t going to become a “Natural Horseman”.
For several years following college I tried different methods and investigated methods of different trainers. Some were downright cruel and learned that I did not want to be like them and so I marked them off my list. Some had good theories but I couldn’t make them work for myself but took what I liked and adapted it to what worked for me. And some I really admired and did my best to be like them. But in all this, all I learned is that I liked just working with my horse the way my horse understood me and what came easy and natural to me. Guess what, that is natural horsemanship. Not the branded “Natural Horsemanship” that became a craze in the 1990’s but just downright talking and working with a horse like a horse.
To get respect and trust we’re going to have to talk discipline.
As we continue to work towards getting your horse’s trust and respect we’re going to have to talk about discipline. Discipline is not all punishment, but you will find yourself in a position where you will have to bite or kick your horse, figuratively speaking.
Now, do not fall into the trap of “I don’t want to hurt my horse” as this begins a very slippery slope into distrust and disrespect from your horse and puts you in the most dangerous of positions around a horse. Watch your horse interact with other horses, or if you have an only horse go and observe a herd of horses at a friend’s place. You will gain invaluable insight in doing this.
The first thing I want you to observe is how horses communicate with each other. They communicate nonverbally with ears first and then teeth and hooves second. When an alpha horse wants another to move they will walk towards them, pin their ears and throw their head toward them as a warning of “if you don’t move I’ll bite you”. If the horse doesn’t move or moves slowly (which is a sign of disrespect) the alpha horse will bite that horse. The degree of the bite varies depending on the relationship and level of respect from the other horse. They may just nip a bit if they think that will work. If that doesn’t work or the alpha knows it won’t they will bite hard and sometimes remove a layer of skin or draw blood. But I tell you what, that horse has a new respect for the alpha and things in the herd will be much more peaceful because of it. The same happens with the hooves.
I remember a clinician at the Iowa Horse Fair last year (it was either Van Hargis or Ryan Rose) that caught my ear as walking by talking about this very subject. He was on his horse and talking about getting his horse to move off with the least amount of effort. He said he will ask his horse to go forward by giving a cue through his body. If the horse doesn’t move he will warn it with a tap of his legs (much like the alpha’s threat of a bite) that if he doesn’t move it will get worse. If this still doesn’t work to get his horse to move then he kicks that horse with the mental thought of “I want to kick his ribs in” and puts that type of force behind his kick with his legs. This does sound extreme to novice horsemen, but he quickly gave his viewpoint and explained that if this horse would refuse the alpha like it was refusing him as the rider, the alpha would turn around and try to kick the horse's ribs in. His point was simply that he was speaking the horse’s language.
Horses speak nonverbally for the most part. An actual sound is out of stress usually or, as we love hearing, a soft nicker of a greet, but this is the depth of their verbal communication. Most times when working my horses I am silent.
Do not give your horse warning after warning because this will make them immune to your hollow threats and makes them lose respect for you rather quickly. Give them at most 3 warnings and then a light bite and increase the bite until they move. We’ll get into more details about this when we talk about specific discipline and correction of the horse in another posting.
“Then the Lord gave the donkey the ability to speak. ‘What have I done to you that deserves your beating me three times?’ it asked Balaam.” Number 22:28 NLT
I think this is one of the most fascinating stories in the Bible, a donkey spoke to its owner. Wouldn’t it be great if our horses could speak to us in the same way? But there is more to the story of Balaam’s donkey than this miracle.
Balaam is riding his donkey to deliver a message to the King of Moab for a handsome price if he delivers the message the king wants to hear. The problem with this is the Lord already told Balaam not to give the king the message he wants to hear because that is not what the Lord is going to do. But Balaam is more interested in the money from the king than the Lord’s will, so he goes anyway. Along the way he is quietly riding past a field, probably dreaming about what he’s going to buy with all the money he’s going to get, when all the sudden the donkey dives off the road, down in the ditch and into the field. I can just envision the donkey doing this because I’ve had several horses do this to me while riding and I always chuckle when I read this story.
Balaam beats his donkey for going off rout, but what he doesn’t know is that the donkey just saved his life from an angel of the Lord who was sent out to destroy Balaam for his disobedience. After this they get back on the road and on course to go to the king. The road narrows and there are walls on either side. The angel of the Lord appears again and this time the donkey presses hard against the wall, crushing Balaam’s foot, to avoid running into the angel. Guess what Balaam does, he beats his donkey. Again I can smile as I read this because I truly understand Balaam’s frustration with the donkey and have had this same thing happen to me before.
A third time Balaam had trouble with his donkey as they were again passing through a narrow part of the road, so narrow that you couldn’t even turn around. This time the donkey just lies down. Balaam beats his donkey again trying to get it back up. And yes, I have had this happen too so I’m still chuckling. This is when the Lord open’s the donkey’s mouth and the donkey speaks words to Balaam. The amazing part is that Balaam is not taken aback by this! He is engaged in conversation with the donkey! If my horse spoke words to me I’m not sure what I would do.
Your horse is speaking to you.
The lesson in all this is the donkey was speaking to Balaam in its own language previously; Balaam just didn’t know how to speak donkaniese (I just made that up). We can learn from this passage many lessons, but the lesson I want you to take from it right now is that your horse is speaking to you. He may know something you don’t, much like when my dad and I were riding and the coyote passed in front of us on the trail (Groundwork: The short and skinny on it), or your horse may be experiencing pain and needs to be looked at by a veterinarian. Possibly your horse may just be extremely disrespectful and you need to put them in their place. I hope I can help you distinguish which it is as we continue in these lessons.
The bottom line is making sure you learn your horse’s language. This takes time and effort, but is very much worth it.
Blessings, Greta